Furry Balls

I for real heard this conversation today. . . . .In my very own home :

Dad to Mom : Have you seen my little furry balls?

Mom : What furry balls?

Dad : You know, the furry balls that you squeeze with your fists and you roll 'em around.

Mom : What?!

Dad : You know, the ones for my upper arm exercises.


And that's when I realized that my dad WASN'T being a freaking pervert.

Oh, and my mom didn't know where they were.  Just in case you were wondering how the story ended.

Weight loss Monday from my bedroom

I've been hit with this insomnia crap ever since I really started dieting and exercising my ass off and it's annoying. I think it actually bugs Cangrejo more than it bugs me, because I stay up and do stuff in bed...........stuff like.......well blogging.  I made you this short little video.  I'm sure tomorrow morning he won't remember any of it.  Anyways I hope not.

Is it inappropriate that I make vlogs in my bed???

Maybe.

Do I care???

Ehh not really.

I would laugh my ass off if someone else did it.

Let's just hope my husband's sense of humor is as good as mine.

Stay tuned for the next week or so.  There could be some big, exciting changes coming my way, and I'm sure you all find me VERY interesting and you want to know everything that's going on in my life.

For real, though, people.  BIG CHANGES.

(NO I'm not pregnant.)

Mambo Number 50!!!

That's right, ladies and gentlemen, this is post numero 50 for Mental Traffic. . . . .there's not really that much traffic, but I think it's a great name and it has some significance for me.  Since I've made it to 50, I feel like I should set a goal or something.  Having said that, I noticed that for the last three months I've put up nine posts every month, so my goal is to put up at least 11 posts a month!!!  (Baby steps, people, baby steps.)

Seeing as it is Weightloss Monday (I'm still trying to think of a better poopy sounding name for it), I'll share with you that I'm still a fat ass.  It's starting to get to me.  Even my fingers are fat.  When I got married my ring barely stayed on and now I can hardly get it off.  This is a problem.  I am trying to walk every day though.  Today I went for two walks and they were so very different from each other.  Same route.  Different speeds.
First I went for a walk with Cangrejo and Isabel.  It was a moderate speed and I got a little bit more than toasted.  Later in the evening I went for another walk, but this time with my dad and Isabel.  Every since my dad had a triple bypass last year, his exercising habits have change a lot.  When he walks, he really hoofs it.  My short little midget legs were just keeping up with his.  (And even though he's about three.....okay four inches taller than me, my legs are about an inch longer.  We've measured.)  I have to say I enjoyed the burn in my calves, but I didn't really enjoy the chaffing going on between my thighs.  That shit has got to stop.

Enough of that sadness.

Since we're on number 50, and that's exciting, I want you to all feel as happy as I do (gag).  Watch this video.  Even if you don't like the music in it, watch it for the drunk guys that are dancing.  Keep an eye on the one in the khaki pants, he's my favorite.  And watch what he does with his belt.  I never, ever, ever get sick of this video.  My students showed it to me a couple months ago, and I still watch it repeatedly.  So, enjoy.  It's only 2 minutes of your life, and it is definitely worth the sacrifice.  Especially if you're having a bad day.